What is your year and major?
Isaac Salay: I am a senior, and Southwest Studies major.
Reed Young: I am a senior, and a Political Science major.
Charlie Simon: I’m a senior and I am majoring in History and Spanish. That’s a double major.
When was it you first knew you wanted to be a delivery boy?
CS: I was watching a highlight from the 2001 NBA Finals, where Allen Iverson stepped over Tyronn Lue’s feet after hitting a jumper on him, and I just knew from that moment onwards that I wanted to do that but with newspapers and basketballs.
RY: I agree with Charlie. We’re all in it together.
Describe your delivery mornings.
RY: Oh god. Well, we wake up. Isaac, you start because you’re the driver.
IS: [Charlie and I] drive over and pick up Reed. We usually get there at about 6:55 a.m. Reed usually comes out at 7:05 a.m. Then we go up to Signature Offset.
RY: And the front door is always locked.
IS: Yeah and we go around. There is always this other dude picking up his Woodmen’s Times or something.
RY: And there’s like 35 other newspapers in [the building]. Like, tons of different kinds of companies.
CS: And then probably the most important part of the day, we go to Chick-Fil-A. Every single time.
IS: The people at Chick-Fil-A… we’re kinda like a big family now.
RY: I get a number 1 and a number 3.
IS: I get two number 1s.
IS: We found out last week that they don’t do their frozen lemonade at 7 in the morning.
RY: No milkshakes at 7 a.m. And then we drive back to campus. Normally eat one of the sandwiches on the road, and then we deliver like half a stack in Worner.
CS: Yeah, and then we deliver all across campus and to a couple places downtown too.
What is the strangest thing that has happened on your delivery route?
IS: Nothing that interesting happens besides going to Chick-Fil-A.
CS: Sometimes the newspapers don’t show up at the print shop.
Do you think that movies accurately portray delivery boys?
IS: I think that delivery boys are always, like, 12-year-old boys on bicycles and that is kind of an inaccurate portrayal.
CS: I think the thing is, I’m not a delivery boy. I’m a delivery man. And, you know… they just… you can’t capture all the love we put into this in a movie.
IS: It really is real life.
What kind of news do you like?
RY: Newspapers and online reading. Politics and sports and culture.
IS: I agree.
If you could deliver any serialized publication what would it be?
RY: The Washington Post. Shout out the D.C., am I right?
CS: This is a hard question… I would deliver the National Inquirer. I would deliver either the National Inquirer or People and Us Weekly.
IS: The Catalyst.
IS: Living off campus.
RY: Having all your good friends in one neighborhood, and sitting on the porch.
CS: Otter Pops, I change my answer to Otter Pops.
IS: Cardinals being 3 and 0.
If you could redo one thing from freshmen year what would it be?
RY: Gone to less Sigma Chi Parties.
IS: Gotten involved with clubs sooner.
CS: Gotten a Venture Grant.
RY: Go on more full moon cruiser rides.
What are you looking forward to this year?
CS: The crippling indecision of doubt and debt, of not being able to find a job after graduating this year, and doing hood-rat things with my friends.
RY: Having a nice senior year and hanging out with friends.